Friday, June 24, 2011


I have yet to write a post about me having another... boy. Yep, that's right, boy #3 is on the way. I have to admit that it has taken this long for me to post about this as I have had to deal with mixed emotions. The "correct" thing to say when people ask a pregnant person if they want a boy or girl seems to be "it doesn't matter as long as they are healthy". So I felt like a villain when I was told it was a boy during the ultrasound and my eyes welled and the smallest tears fell ever so slowly down my face.
This whole pregnancy kinda threw me off. I wanted to have another child but the reality of it all was a different story. This time around I don't have my mom to help me navigate through the rough patches, or to watch the boys when Tim and I need some time to ourselves. Plus, the boys are getting older, more able to entertain themselves, they are at that age you can rough house with them, and they are more independent and starting school. The thought of starting that over was a little overwhelming. If it was a girl though... my mom really wanted me to have a girl, I wanted to birth the mother/daughter relationship that I just so recently lost. I wanted to braid hair and put her in a tutu! I wanted to dress her up in a Tinkerbell costume and go to Disneyland. There is an age difference of 3 years between my youngest and this baby, but if it was a girl she would have 2 wonderful older brothers to look out for her. I would sometimes wander to the girls section of the store and my heart would skip a beat with the thought of being blessed with a little girl.
Here I am now, 5 months pregnant with a boy. Although I did need to take time to mourn not having a little girl I am abundantly blessed with what I have been given. God has a perfect plan for me and my family. I know He knows what He is doing. I know we have the perfect spot in our family for this little one. In the years ahead I may never have food in the fridge, or a shirt without a stain. My house will always smell like... well, boys! Sports, and rough housing will just be the DNA of this family but I look forward to every minute.
If these boys have half of the patience, and kindness, and love for Christ their father has, we will have done alright!

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